Just Beyond the Riverbend... (On Iraq, pt. 1)

I have never intended to make this blog specifically religious or political and I do not intend to do so now. However, there are some situations and events which I cannot help but write my opinion on. I do promise that I do some background checking and research before I go so far as to allow myself to post a blog as I refuse to ramble ignorantly.
I was only 17 when the United States took it's "military action" against Iraq and Saddam Hussein's regime, but I was against it even then for the lack of evidence of WMDs and the lack of support in the UN. Though I agreed Osama bin Ladin and al-Qaeda should be pursued, I was wary of the intentional, yet blind attitude of war the United States had taken on since 9-11 and was afraid of the blood lust that Americans possessed. In late 2004, I found a blog which intrigued me and began my education process on the true situation for Iraqis since the beginning of the Iraq war. The blogger simply went by the alias of "Riverbend" or "River" for short. She was born in Iraq, but lived abroad several years before returning there (which was more common than many might think) and was thus fluent in English. I would highly recommend reading Riverbend's blog Baghdad Burning.
I checked her blog today because I realized I had not done so in quite some time and found out that she had stopped blogging over a year ago when she and her family had fled to Damascus, Syria. Today I wrote her an e-mail encouraging her to continue blogging and sharing her experiences and opinions if possible. I can not agree with all of her opinions about Americans, but I do believe that her experiences and opinions are valid and valuable and therefore need to be shared.

River,
I don't know if you're blogging on-line any where these days, but I have followed your Riverbend "Baghdad Burning" blog on and off since 2004. I am an American who has been fiercely against the war since the beginning and was quite quickly disillusioned with the media, therefore I found your blogging of your experiences and opinions to be highly valuable. I have been reading other blogs, regional magazine entries, and journals to keep updated, but hadn't stopped by your blog in over a year. I always find your entries to be heart wrenching, but your last few, especially about Sabrine and your experience of having to flee to Damascus, made me weep (more than usual, I should say). I don't know where you are--whether you are still in Damascus, have gone back to Iraq, or have moved elsewhere--but please don't stop writing. Even if you are no longer in Iraq, your voice is needed. Your voice is needed now just as much as it was over the past four years. Though American sentiment has begun to change, the truth is still unknown (covered up by those in power in the government) and it is difficult for the common people to understand the atrocities that have and are still taking place due to the highly mis-informative media. As always, I pray for peace between our countries, within your nation and among all Iraqis, and for all families scattered across the earth who are broken and scarred by this horrific war. May Allah bless you and keep you.

Dani
aka Brownidgurl85

Some may be slightly confused as to why I added the last sentence. "Allah" in Arabic means "God" and is actually used by Arab Christians as well. Therefore, the word seemed fitting. See, you learn something new every day. ;)
Others may say to me, "Dani, she is Iraqi and Sunni and therefore is going to be incredibly biased about all of this." Of course there is a bias on her part, as there is a bias on all of ours. But it is when we educate ourselves on what is being experienced and open up our minds to consider the opinions of others that we begin to scratch the surface of the truth. Americans have been in the dark for far too long. More to come later.

Great Expectations: A Look at Ministry and Spiritual Gifts

While sitting in chapel last night, I wrote the following:
"Sitting in Kaleo trying to follow one of our campus pastors during a sermon can be a painful process. If I hear the word "hope" one more time when she is trying to describe the feeling and idea behind "hope", I may just scream. Or if she goes on for another five minutes about how excited she is about the story that she is going to be sharing with us this evening and how she keeps a list of stories in her journal and always checks to see if her sermon will fit one of them in and its one of the most amazing stories she's ever heard in her life and she so ecstatic and privileged to share it, I may just need to hit my head against the chair in front of me. TELL THE STORY ALREADY! (I'm sure it doesn't help that someone around me has a really bad gas problem tonight... stinky chicken gas... like a chicken "farm"... yes... stinky chicken.)
Exactly why listening to this campus pastor is so painful, I'm not sure, but I believe part of the problem is that her sermons are so scattered and she comes off as inarticulate. I have to wonder just how many public speaking classes she took and who passed her. I'm not trying to be mean, because I believe she is a wonderful person and has many good insights and things to say, but public speaking is not how she should go about doing it."
It does bother me a bit that any one who has their M.Div. is automatically received as a person prepared for pastoring and speaking to a large group of people. I'm sorry, but that just doesn't make any sense to me practically or biblically. In 1 Corinthians 12, Paul reminds the Christians at Corinth that there are different types of spiritual gifts. Why the Church expects all ministers and pastors to have the same spiritual gifts and be able to partake in the same types of ministry, I don't understand. I do understand that there are certain qualities a pastor or minister much possess, but I believe that people who have the ministerial calling should use the gifts God has given them and not always have "gifts" forced upon them. The pastor at my old church was a poor public speaker as well, but he was fantastic with the written word and was really wonderful for Christian counseling. I believe this campus pastor may have similar gifts and that she is and can be a great blessing to the APU community, but that this current job and it's expectations do not fit well with her spiritual gifts. I wish people in the Church would pay more attention to spiritual gifts when placing others in ministerial positions, and I hope this person can find her particular calling and be able to use it at this campus.

The Sea of Faces and Hall of Mirrors

It's incredibly difficult to accurately describe the chaos which surround me. A this moment, I sit alone among dozens and dozens of chattering students, faculty, and staff. "Order up for Tina, Michael, and Andrew!" the head chef yells out like the announcer at a rodeo. All he's missing is that stiff, felt or leather head piece which has become the symbol of the American West; the ten-gallon cowboy hat. As he calls, a wave of hopefuls approach the counter; perhaps their name will be next.
I look over to the table next to me and see a young male who seems to be waiting on friends. "Good Lord," I think. "That boy looks like he's in junior high! God, PLEASE don't let me be that old yet..." His father and older sister come to meet him. Apparently, she is the student, but still looks like a high school student.
I've realized in the last couple of months that I've begun to see my college experience that same way I now view my high school, junior high, and elementary experiences. They've all seemed so great at the time--partially, I think, because I built those mile stones up so much in my mind-- but now seem so juvenile. I certainly don't disregard the experiences, but I just look back and think, "I really thought I was grown up then, didn't I? How ridiculous I was!"
So many a visage in this sea of faces reflect the ideal I had of the college experience, mainly among the young students. I see the anticipation, the lust for adventure within the world of knowledge and society. I see the blossoming of friendships and romances, some of which may actually last through the college years and into a lifetime. I see the desire for achievement and a highly spoken name. I had these ideals of the college experience as well. Not all of them have proven false, you'll be glad to know, but I've found more important things since beginning this excursion into my higher education. Still, I see a piece of myself in every person here. I see myself in this sea of faces as if I were standing in a hall of mirrors.

The Purport of the Pomegranate

Often times I have found myself mulling over pomegranates. This afternoon was one such occasion. Recently, I have been seeing pomegranates everywhere--in refrigerators, on counter tops, and on tables in homes and apartments. However, every time I look, I see the pomegranate is still there after several days. Is the pomegranate something which one buys in order to make one's self look more cultured, but does not eat? Is it even possible to eat a pomegranate? This, I know, to be possible, but would like to put forth that it may be pointless--just as pointless as I find eating sunflower seeds to be, perhaps more.
See, apparently pomegranates are a tasty fruit. I know this because I have had the opportunity to drink pomegranate juice on a few occasions. I know that the pomegranate has been eaten and traded for over 4,000 years in eastern Asia through Northern Africa and even parts of Europe. However, I really think the person who discovered pomegranates and the fact that they are edible was absolutely starving. For this, I have three reasons:
1) Their skin is incredibly thick, difficult to peel off, and not edible.
2) The membranes between the sections of seeds are very thick, bitter, and (again) not edible.
3) The pomegranate seeds are just that... juicy seeds! It isn't a nice piece of fruit that a person gets to bite into once they finally get to the "good stuff", but a myriad of slippery seeds that are difficult to pull from the membrane and have very little sweet juice before the bitter middle...
All that for approximately 70 calories and some vitamin C. So, what is the point of a pomegranate? I propose that, although the juice tastes nice and the colour is beautiful, a pomegranate is nearly pointless as a fruit. I'm positive that is the reason why my mother buys one every fall and lets it wither away!

The Causticity of the Term "Thanksgiving"

Why do we wish one another a "happy Thanksgiving"? What does it mean? Are we not simply saying to each other "have a lovely day sitting back and counting your blessings"? Why must we wish each other a happy Thanksgiving when we should be more than content counting our blessings in the first place and happiness should, therefore, be implied by the word "thanksgiving"? I've thought on this subject over the last couple of days. I am still doing quite a bit of thinking on this matter, but I'm forming the opinion that Americans specifically mean "have a fun day filled with those who matter to you and good food while considering yourselves blessed in general and forgetting the real needs of those less fortunate than you" when we say that frequented holiday phrase of which I write.

Christians are called to give thanks in all circumstances and I pray that one day God will mold me into someone who can do that much more easily than I do now, but regardless of Christianity's specific call, the ability to give thanks, be grateful, and act out of that gratitude are things all Americans (excepting, perhaps, those who are in need of our help (those living on the streets, in shelters, in railroad cars, etc.)) should do for the countless number of blessings we have in this nation of ours. The level of apathy in these United States towards our fellow human beings not only troubles, but sickens me. What sickens me even more is that I find this apathy in myself. I nearly nauseate myself when, say, I'm in my apartment during the middle of a torrential storm and catch myself complaining because there is a slight draft in the room when I haven't even stopped to wonder what the local homeless are doing to try to stay out of the rain. I am just as guilty as anyone.

So what if we don't use the expression "Happy Thanksgiving" next year? What if we say "Give Thanks!" just to change things up and get people thinking? And what if we started acting out our thanks (this we don't have to wait a year for!)? Just think about it.

A Moment of Silence for Art

Dear Friends and Readers,
Just posting a few shots I've been able to take over my Thanksgiving break so far... :)
Let me know what you think! haha... -Dani

O Me Merry Megrim!

This morning I awoke, showered, and dressed to get ready for class only to be met by my arch nemesis often depicted in Imitrex commercials as a small, green villainous monster who enjoys pounding about within peoples' craniums with a large hammer. In other words, I was overcome by a sudden migraine. For those who have never suffered from the aforementioned ailment, consider yourselves enviable.
You'll notice in the title of this post that I used the word "megrim" instead of migraine. I recently found out that medically, they can be used interchangeably in the English language. The funny thing about "megrim", however, is that in a non-medical community the word can refer to a fish, depression, a whim, or a fancy! What a confusing word megrim can be! For that very reason, it may be the perfect word to call a migraine! Depending on the stage of the migraine (or megrim), I may be incredibly depressed or, if I'm on a caffeine high and getting over my migraine, I will become rather whimsical and ridiculous. Therefore, I think the word "megrim" is here to stay!

Intro to Blog and a Replay of the Fall of Man

Giving in to a good friend's suggestion, I've created this blog not because I have so much time on my hands that I don't know what to do with, but because I have realized that time is against me and, therefore, I simply must get all my ridiculous thoughts and musings out somewhere . That is where you all come in--you're my guinea pigs (by choice of course!). I've found over the past few years that all of us (at least those of us who are truthful with ourselves) have a need and desire to experience the ridiculous and absurd from time to time in order to maintain our sanity. This is something I used to ridicule my mother for when I was younger, but have recently learned to enjoy, savor, and partake of as frequently as possible. It is with this intention of expressing my silly thoughts and wonder struck musings that I begin this chronicle.

***Teetotalers and wine really don't have much, if anything to do with my writings at this point. :)


Last Tuesday I found myself eating lunch and studying before class when I had the most exhilarating and odd experience. I was reading and minding my own business when I bit into a Gala apple and suddenly my mouth was full of the most delightful juices! It was one of the best apples I've had in years! I was so excited by the delicious taste that I nearly ran up to the first person I saw and pushed my apple up in their face to tell them to take a bite because it was so wonderful that I simply had to share! At that moment, however, an unfamiliar gentleman walked by and I immediately realized the implications and imagery I would be arousing were I to approach a man with a piece of fruit tempting him to take a bite! Thankfully, I was fully clothed and my name starts with a D and not an E, so I had those two things going for me. Never the less, I had a good laugh to myself over the incident.
-Dani